Resurrecting a Dream
Last spring, my keystroke hovered over a few weekend dates on an Airbnb booking page.
Heartbroken, but desperate to love my own company, I found a quiet, single room with a kayak dock.
It was one of my favourite parts of having close friends and a long-term relationship. Packing up the car, cranking some beautiful music, exploring a new area and spending time in a slower-pace with people I loved.
They don’t tell you that, when you lose relationships or friends, you lose the ability to certain things you love. It becomes unsafe (thanks to patriarchy and violence), more expensive, unrealistic, less exciting - and just really hard to do.
My laptop screen stayed open on that Airbnb booking site for months. Months after the weekend that I had picked out for this solo trip.
Today, I’m getting on a plane, solo, to travel to BC for my first out-of-province speaking engagement. Last night I finished packing at 9pm, wrote a blog post and cried a little.
I let myself lose the part of me that loves travel and adventure because I didn’t know how to do it anymore. I was focused on survival; so much so that I forgot who I am when I’m flourishing.
I’m terrified, dudes. But I’m also grateful to feel like life kinda took care of me on this one. It looked at how far I’ve come and said, “Hey, you’re doing great. But remember how much you loved this? Let’s try it again.”
I can’t even put into words how hard the past year is been, much like I can’t really put into words how much this trip means to me. (Shoutout to @jackdotorg for reminding me of my dream and making this an accessible experience for your youth.)
